Previously on GiGo’s Corner: Webbie steals GiGo’s possessions. GiGo is at conflict about whether to unpurify (yes I said unpurify) Webbie’s water supply. Episode 2 this season continues with Chubbs, the other white meat.
I don’t consider myself as someone who has high standards, at least not when it comes to my expectations of other people’s actions and behaviors. I don’t really expect much from people with the world we live in and whatnot. Now from a perspective, one might think I am some sort of cynical misanthrope.
Where’s the optimism? When did you become so cold?
My mom is very melodramatic much like my grandma, so quotes like that may be a bit misguided but not far from the truth. Why must I be a little cautionary at times? There is a history of people everyone comes across in their lifetime that shapes their thinking and their attitudes. We are products of our environment. Is evil born or is it made? (Think of Regina from Once Upon A Time). That point being and as I have already said I don’t expect much from people, sometimes maybe even the worst. So when there comes a person who can exceed my expectations of the worst to überworst, it is quite telling.
Insert Chubbs here. Chubbs as I have explained in episode 1 is
good friends? with Webbie. She’s apparently not very social and is quite immature. Everyday around dinnertime, you can expect a aimless rant about the sky being blue when she comes home from campus. And she does this in her best falcetto, or maybe an octave higher than that where some poor dog out there is dying. Oh and let’s not forget the occasional rant about how she ran into me. Did I mention how much I detest this person? As someone who doesn’t have many items for use within the kitchen she shares with Webbie and dun dun dun… swipes some of my wares from time to time. Chubbs’ use of my kitchenware wouldn’t bother me if she actually cleaned them. But no, that’s not in her etiquette. Chubbs likes to keep everyone’s dishes in her room or leave them in the sink until Jesus takes her. Now I could understand if she was a very busy student. But she’s not. Either before or after she takes her soapbox in front of Webbie (and in front of my door?) she takes her double wide keester to her room and watches netflix. At obnoxious levels mind you. I don’t mean to be judgmental but what the fuck do you have going on that you can’t wash the dishes? There isn’t even a need to hand wash them as both Webbie and Chubbs use the dish washer. Who’d of thought loadings dishes was so hard?
But here’s the best part: Chubbs’ boyfriend, Andy, always visits at the beginning of the week for a day or two at a time. Instead of Chubbs doing her own chores she
screams like a banshee orders Andy to do it. And like her bitch he does it. My reaction every time:
Why does he continually take her verbal abuse? I will never know. Maybe Mr. Andy is a masochist. BDSM comes to mind. #brainbleachplease. He might not like me in defense of his nasty girlfriend, but the guy has manners whenever he conjugal visits. Enough manners to not be one of those boyfriends who think they own the fucking place. That’s a plus one for him. But then there’s that awkward way he sits in the farthest chair in the corner stroking Ponyo, Webbie’s cat, resembling Dr. Evil with his bald head. Whatever.
The worst of it is that Chubbs can’t comprehend why I would be irritated at this terrible habit she has and has the nerve to be irritated with me. IF YOU USE MY SHIT YOU CLEAN IT BITCH! It’s only logical. #bitchesbetrippin’
So not only do I dream of Ms. Webbie guzzling toilet water but I also dream of turning Chubbs into bacon. I mean, there has to be some justice. When will this girl get hers? Everyday I ponder this. I hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel, because I am about ready to get off this pain train.
I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
-Unknown wise person